Avoiding Divorce Page 2

Page 2

Avoiding Divorce – Restore Your Marriage

Title: How to avoid divorce.

Author: Joshua

Article:
As you may know, the divorce rate in the USA these days is around 50%.

That's right, on average, one of out every two couples that marries will no longer be together "until death do they part". How do you think it might change weddings if the people involved realized that, without serious effort, there was a 50% chance that that couple would wind up so miserable that they would regret the wedding they now eagerly plan together?

How tragic! Many couples in the later stages of their marriage think to themselves, "If only we could bring back that love and romance, do away with the problems, and stay together and avoid divorce, we could be happy again." Yet no matter how much they try to "make things better", it often doesn't end up working.

Was the relationship prone to failure from the beginning, or did one person or the other just give up somewhere along the way? Sometimes, these questions will never be answered fully, but the good news is that many times, a divorce can be avoided - even up to 90% of the time where it is in a crisis stage. While the list of tips below isn't always a surefire way to resolve everything, if you apply them to your marriage, it may be the difference between a life of love forever, or a sad, $20,000 divorce.

1) Avoid divorce by admitting your fault.

This is a really hard one. No one likes to admit they are wrong - especially if they don't even feel that they are! Sometimes, however, we are so rooted in our personal view of the situation that we can't stop, take a step back, and realize where we ourselves are to blame for the problems at hand. Some of the most powerful words in a relationship are a genuine "I'm sorry."

Many times when you honestly apologize for something that's gone wrong, even if you yourself feel that you are mostly right, you will find your spouse may be more receptive to what you have to say, or may even admit fault as well, leading to healing, conflict resolution, and mending a hard time.

2) Avoid divorce by avoiding fights over small problems.

Marriage in a way is a higher calling to be intimate with another person - and part of this means both seeing their major and minor flaws, and consciously choosing to overlook some of them. No one's perfect. That includes you :) The more you can overlook the other person's small flaws, the better. Sure, it might not always be the easiest thing to do, but if you set your mind to it, you really can do it!

Maybe your spouse has a bad habit of _______. You could choose to be annoyed about it. Or, you could choose to sit down, talk to them, tell them your worries, and then work out a compromise. Or even better, you could choose to ignore it, because, chances are, they're ignoring something about YOU that irritates THEM too! Forgive and forget, and overlook all but the biggest problems, and you'll save yourself endless hours of fighting over the stupidest things.

3) Avoid divorce by being sensitive to the others' needs.

One of the root causes of problems in life as well as marriage is selfishness. We find the other person is not attending to our needs as we wish, for some reason, so we grow defensive, and find we have to protect our views - sometimes at the other's expense - and thus it becomes a war of selfishness, each person feeling that they can't let down their guard, else the other person might "get their way" and get what they want instead of give it to us.

This is totally wrong! Any relationship based on one's self rather than the other is doomed to fail. Instead, be mature, even if the other person is not, and extend genuine love and attention to their needs. Sometimes their needs might not be what you think they are, so if you are unsure, feel free to ask them! No one ever rejected a question like "How I can I better meet your needs and make you happy?" Only when you are taking strides to make sure the other is happy can you break down those defensive walls of selfishness.

These are just some of the tips that scratch the surface of avoiding divorce. The true solution to keeping your marriage happy is simply to find the other person's needs - in all areas, and do your best to meet them, regardless of if your own are being met. Give it time, give it faith, and all will fall into place.

About the author:
Joshua is a researcher about love, marriage, and relationships. If your marriage is in danger or you just feel like things are hopeless, Joshua recommends http://www.laptopinfo.net/moreinfo.php?page=maw savethemarriage.com, where crisis marriages are saved 90% of the time, and love can be restored to hurting hearts. http://www.laptopinfo.net/moreinfo.php?page=maw. Save
your marriage.


Title: Learn The Seductive Art of Writing A Love Letter

Author: Abbas Abedi

Article:
Personal, handwritten love letters are an ideal way to express your feelings to someone. They are not difficult to create if you are true to your feelings and give it some careful thought. Write what moves you best, be sincere and you will be sure to bring a smile to your love's face.

Waxing Poetic

Anyone can just copy a favorite love poem and then send it off. What will touch their heart best is something of your own design. You can use the example of another poem, changing the words around to suit your expression.

You can take several different poems, in fact, and then take what you love most from each of them to create your own. This takes some practice, Try starting with just one sentence. Change the words around to reflect your own personal feelings and then go on from there.

Personalize a Blank Card

You can buy beautiful and artistic cards that have only an outside picture and a blank sheet inside for you to create your own prose. Take your time and write out a verse that you think will be meaningful to your loved one.

Practice first with a scrap piece of paper and then when you have it just perfect, carefully print or write it out in the inside of the card.

Leave Your Note where it will be found

It will be a nice surprise for your loved one to find your note, unexpected. Don't hide it so well that he or she won't find it! Leave it in a common place that you are sure he or she will go looking. When they find it they can enjoy it all alone.

Own your Prose

Make sure you get good credit for writing your loved one. Don't think that if you mark your note "anonymous" that she will just know it is from you.

Give a Gift

Include a little something that can be inserted inside the card or letter. A small gift will make your love note extra meaningful.

The romantic act of expressing your love in writing is always a special gift to receive and this becomes a keepsake for a lifetime!

Place your Love Notes in Creative Places

Adding the element of surprise to your love note is always special to the receiver. Here are some really creative suggestions about where you can leave your handwritten love note:

In their shoes, in their lunch bag everyday, under their pillow, when they travel just insert one into their luggage, in their laptop bag at night to be discovered first thing in the morning at work, for the reader: in their bookmarked page, on their car windshield/wipers, you get the idea?

By now we all realize that one of the most important things to remember in a committed relationship is to keep the romance
alive and thriving.

It is all too easy to take one another for granted after a period of time passes. Doing this, though, will not produce a strong love life and is not conducive for ongoing passion.

Easily the most effective way of keeping your relationship fresh and filled with love and appreciation is to simply nurture romance.

About the author:
Abbas Abedi--Men: Learn the art of skillful dating to make women realy, really like you. Visit my http://dating-and-seduction-tips.blogspot.com Dating for Men blog.


Title: The Secrets of a Strong, Happy Marriage

Author: SavePress Magazines

Article:
Do you believe in finding that "special someone" who is your other half, your soulmate? Do you dream of finding the one person in all the world who will understand you, love you and be there for you, no matter what? If so, you're not alone. In fact, statistics show that about 90% of adults will get married at least once in their lives.

Considering that about 43% of all marriages in the U.S. ends in divorce, perhaps a class on the realities of building and maintaining a strong healthy marriage should become required before signing on the dotted line of a marriage license.

Having a happy marriage doesn't just happen by accident. It doesn't happen because you're "in love" or "perfect" for each other. Marriage is a partnership, and like any partnership, it takes commitment, dedication and hard work to help it to grow strong.

Here are some tips given by couples whose marriages are strong and healthy. Follow them, adapt them to work in your own marriage, and you'll be on your way to having what we all want-- a happy marriage!

1. Communicate. It's important that you keep the lines of communication open. Especially when things go wrong. There are so many outside influences that can affect a marriage, jobs, family, friends, hobbies, education, church. If you're suddenly not being able to spend time together, or you're fighting about money, it's especially important to talk about what's going on.

2. Listen. It's a sad fact that we are often more polite to strangers than we are to the people we love the most. If your spouse is trying to talk to you, give them the same courtesy you'd give a complete stranger, and LISTEN!

3. Create rituals and family traditions. Every successful couple has their own private rituals - things they do that have a special meaning just to them. So whether it's getting your spouse coffee every morning or a special touch that means "I love you", remember to create special times together. Someday, you'll look back on each time as a treasured memory.

4. Go on a date. Couples who have been together for thirty, forty and even fifty years or more say that one of the things that have kept their marriage strong is going out on a "date" with their spouse on a regular basis. If money is tight, try taking a walk together, going to a 4 dollar movie, or even to a drive-in. Spending quality "couple-time" helps to reinforce the special feelings that made you fall in love with each other in the first place.

5. Agree on money matters early. Amazingly, many couples never discuss money except in the most superficial ways until after they're married. One of the leading causes of arguments in marriages is because of a difference in how money is handled by each partner. Before you walk down the isle, discuss your feelings about things like credit, paying bills and saving money. Talk about how you will pay expenses, and who will handle the money. Finding out after the fact that you have major differences is only going to lead to long term problems.

6. Love and Respect. No matter what happens outside of your marriage, it's vital that you and your spouse always treat each other with love and respect. There are some simple rules that have worked for couples for the last 80 years that still apply today.

They include: Never go to bed angry. Kiss each other every time you come home, or before going out. Say "I love you" every single day. Mind your manners, and say "Please" and "Thank-you". Do something for the one you love every day. Just because. Don't sweat the little things. Try something new once in a while.

7. Maintain a commitment to your marriage. This can be especially difficult today, but it's important that you put your marriage first. If you're committed to making your marriage a success, and you know that your partner shares your commitment, there's nothing that the two of you can't accomplish.

These are the secrets to a truly happy marriage!

About the author:
This article was produced by SavePress Magazines. SavePress Publications is now offering a FREE Classic Desserts Cook Book.
Our friends can get it for FREE at this website: http://www.savepress.com/free-dessert-recipes.html

 

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