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Are you having a hard time getting your child to do their chores?
If they do their chores, are they done correctly according to your standards?
Do you find it takes hours for them to do the most basic and simple chores?
Did you show them what you wanted done and how to do that chore or did you just tell them to GET IT DONE?
Teaching a child is different from telling them. Just telling a child to do something without showing them what to do and how to do it will only lead to frustration for both of you.
Remember when you were TOLD to do something you did not know what to do or how to do it. In teaching your children what they must do and how they must do it, both of you share a special time together. Your child may not like what they have to do, but they will enjoy time with you. Try to make it an adventure or in some way make it fun for them. You might be surprised how much easier it will be for both of you when they need to do chores. This in and of itself may not solve your problem with your child not doing their chores, but it is a good place to start.
Children like to be rewarded for doing their chores. Many parents may be reluctant to pay their child for doing chores. If you reward your child with an allowance for doing chores, you can, in the process, teach them about money management. This shows your child, at an early age, that when they become an adult they will have to work to get paid by their employer. You can also show them how to save their money and how best to use their money for what they want and what they need. The articles below will give you some suggestions to get you and your child started on the adventure of doing chores. You can also use the suggestions below to help you make a chores checklist. You can assign points to each chore and an allowance value to each chore.
Kids and Chores
By Elizabeth Pantley, Author of Perfect Parenting and Kid Cooperation
Assigning children household chores is one of the best ways to build self-esteem and a feeling of competence. Regular chores establish helpful habits and good attitudes about work. Having chores also teaches valuable lessons about life and creates an understanding that there are jobs that must be done to run a household. Children who grow up perceiving chores as a normal part of life will find the flow into adulthood much easier than those without responsibility will.
Choose the right chores: Choose age appropriate jobs for children based on their physical and mental abilities. Most parents underestimate their children's abilities in this area. Keep in mind that a child who has mastered a complicated computer game can easily run the dishwasher! Preschoolers can handle one or two simple daily jobs. Older children can manage two or three daily jobs along with one or two weekly jobs. (See the suggested list at the end of this article.)
Take time for training. Don't assume that since your child has seen you do the task that she can do it herself. Be very specific in your instruction and demonstrate step-by-step as your child watches. The next step is to let your child help you, followed by your child doing the chore as you supervise. At the point you feel that your child has mastered the job she can take over responsibility for it.
Write it down: Children need a visual daily reminder to keep them on track doing chores. (This compares to your need for a daily planner sheet or to-do list.) A chore chart on which a child can make daily check marks is one helpful technique. An alternative is to use a pegboard made for hanging keys as a holder for tags that list a daily chore on each one. A child can flip the tags over as she completes each daily chore. At the end of the day, a parent can check for any open tags and have the child finish up before getting ready for bed.
First things first: Use the "when/then" technique. As an example, "When the pets are fed, then you may have your dinner." As a quiet reminder, the child's dinner plate can be left upside down, which means: "Run and feed the pets, then you can eat!" Other when/then routine suggestions are: "When your homework is done, then you can play outside." "When your pajamas are on and teeth brushed, then we will read a book." What makes this idea work best is when you follow the when/then rule every day.
Be specific: Be very specific in your instructions. As an example, "clean your room" is vague and can be interpreted in any number of ways. Instead, be explicit by saying, "Put your clothes in the closet, books on the shelf, dishes in the kitchen and toys in the toy box."
Bonus Day! Once in a while, just for fun, have a "Coin Collection Day." Prior to having your child complete her chores, hide pennies, nickels, or dimes around the house under the items that need to be cleaned. When all the chores are done to your satisfaction, the child gets to keep the bonus!
Chore list ideas: What follows is a list of ideas from which you can choose a few chores for your child. The idea is not to turn your child into Cinderella! Simply review the list, consider your child's age, ability, and personality, and select chores appropriate for your child. Preschoolers can handle one or two simple jobs. As children get older and more capable they can handle a larger quantity of jobs, as well as those that are more complex.
Ages 2 to 3: Put toys away, fill pet's food dish, put clothes in hamper, wipe up spills, dust, pile books or magazines, choose clothes and dress self.
Ages 4 to 5: Above plus, make own bed, empty wastebaskets, bring in mail or newspaper, clear table, pull weeds, use hand-held vacuum to pick up crumbs, water flowers, unload utensils from dishwasher, wash plastic dishes at sink, fix bowl of cereal.
Ages 6 to 7: Above plus, sort laundry, sweep floors, handle personal hygiene, set and clear table, help make and pack lunch, weed, rake leaves, keep bedroom tidy, pour own drinks, answer telephone.
Ages 8 to 9: Above plus, load dishwasher, put away groceries, vacuum, help make dinner, make own snacks, wash table after meals, put away own laundry, sew buttons, run own bath, make own breakfast, peel vegetables, cook simple food (such as toast), mop floor, take pet for a walk, pack own suitcase
Ages 10 and up: Above plus, unload dishwasher, fold laundry, clean bathroom, wash windows, wash car, cook simple meal with supervision, iron clothes, do laundry, baby-sit younger siblings (with adult in the home), mow lawn, clean kitchen, clean oven, change bed, make cookies or cake from box mix, plan birthday party, have neighborhood job - such as pet care or yard work, or have a paper route.
The above article was borrowed from: http://www.parent.net/article/archive/chores.shtml
Chores for Kids - Tips to Help You Get Started
When you first assign chores for kids, it will certainly be more work for you parents than if you were completing the tasks yourself. Having a 2 or 3 year old helping out with the laundry definitely has a tendency to slow you down!
When our sons first started wanting to help out around the house, they wanted to help with everything! I remember having to hide my frustration to be moving more quickly. Instructing children on completing tasks certainly does take up more of your time. But the payoff is huge!
Now, we have young sons who are able to do an entire load of laundry, weed a garden, vacuum, dust and a myriad of other tasks with minimal supervision - and I'm able to get twice as much done with their help.
If your children are a little bit older and you're just getting around to assigning chores to them, they will probably put up some resistance to the whole process.
Here are some tips for getting started with assigning chores for kids:
Break it down - When teaching chores, parents should break each one down into small parts. For example, instead of telling a child to clean his bedroom and leaving it at that, parents should list all of the things that make up the chore of cleaning the bedroom, for example, changing the sheets, picking up toys and putting them away, dusting the dresser, and vacuuming. Parents should then show their children how to do each part of the chore correctly.
Don't do it yourself - Parents should not do their children's work for them. If parents get frustrated and give in and do their children's chores, children learn a number of things. First of all, children learn that their parents don't mean what they say and will not follow through. Secondly, children learn that if they hold out long enough someone will do their chores for them. Parents should simply apply consequences until their children comply.
Don’t redo the chore -Re-doing a job is the quickest way to lose help. Just keep in mind that you need to explain the job more clearly next time, or maybe he’s not ready yet. If you absolutely can’t stand it, use it as a teaching opportunity to show your child how you would like the job done or take care of it when you are certain the child won’t catch you.
Don’t hover - When the cat’s tail is getting caught in the vacuum—jump in. However, try to allow your child the chance to do it on his own.
Don't nag - When your youngster does not complete his chores and other responsibilities, it may be necessary to discipline him. For example, you might decide to revoke certain privileges or special activities that mean a lot to him. Although some parents may feel that badgering or scolding a child to the point of starting an argument will get his to accept more responsibility, this approach is rarely effective. Rewarding successes and providing encouragement is always much more effective.
Explain Why - Children need to know why pitching in and helping is important. Parents should explain that doing chores benefits the whole family, and that every person must do his or her part to keep things going smoothly.
Give choices -Children complain about jobs that are assigned. Involve your child in picking chores and setting the time when the job must be done. Today we must vacuum, do the laundry, clean out the refrigerator and wash windows. Where do you want to start? Allowing your child to make choices will encourage responsibility.
Let them enjoy - Children need to enjoy the sense of accomplishment that goes along with completing a task. This sense of satisfaction and feeling that they are contributing to the family is going to keep them working with you as they get older. Research shows feelings of satisfaction and contribution are much greater motivators than pay, praise or punishment!
Make it easy - If your child is to set the table, can he reach the dishes? Are the dishes breakable? Be sure the child can do the job with ease, according to size and developmental stage.
Make it Age Appropriate - "The level of expected chores should be appropriate to the child's skill and ability. But even for very young children, helping around the house allows a child to feel like a vital part of the family.
Make the job important -Children feel rewarded by work that is seen as “needed.” Let your child know how much his effort has helped the family. Even little tasks help out.
Provide logical consequences - Logical consequences occur naturally as a result of children's actions. For example, if a child repeatedly forgets to put his bike away at the end of the day, a logical consequence would be not being allowed to use the bicycle for a few days. On the other hand, a logical consequence for a child who repeatedly works hard and completes his chores would be to be given special play time. Parents and children should decide upon consequences in advance. Parents should always follow through on applying consequences, whether they are positive or negative.
Show appreciation - No one likes to be taken for granted. No matter how rewarding the sense of accomplishment may be—it is good to hear “thank you.” Adding a specific comment like “you really folded the towels neatly” may mean more than just “good job.”
Show them how - Children need to know exactly what's expected of them. Therefore, it is a good idea for parents to make sure their children know exactly what their duties are. Parents should thoroughly go over the duties required, and should actually show their children how to do the chore at hand. It might also be a good idea to write down and post all duties that make up a single chore for children's reference. At first, parents should monitor their children to make sure things are going well. Parents can reduce monitoring once children know how to do the chore.
Start early - Parents should start giving their children household responsibilities when they are young. Most toddlers love to help their parents. Parents should take advantage of this desire and give their children small and simple tasks. As children get older, they should then be given more challenging tasks.
Stick to a Routine - Your child may be greatly helped in remembering to do chores if your family life has a structure and routines. Encourage him to do his chores at the same time each day. Routines of other activities - including meals, homework, play and bedtime - also can teach organization and help him develop responsibility. Make a chore chart to help your child remember what they need to complete during that day.
Switch chores - Try switching tasks or coming up with ideas to keep the interest and enthusiasm. It’s hard to get excited about something you’ve done a thousand times!
Teach one chore - It is probably a good idea for parents to thoroughly teach their children how to do one chore, and then to make sure that they are consistently doing it correctly before moving on to other chores. Young children can become confused when they are required to learn too much at one time.
Work side by side - At different ages, children need different levels of help and support while doing their chores. Parents should work side-by-side with young children, washing the dishes as the child clears plates from the dinner table, for example. The more you do with them when they're young, the more they can do by themselves later.
If handled correctly, chores for kids should really help your household to run more smoothly. In time, it will also help your children to learn responsibility and will prepare them to successfully take care of themselves once they are living on their own. Give it a try and watch your workload begin to lighten!
The above article was borrowed from: http://www.homeschool-your-boys.com/chores-for-kids.html