Building a Christian Family

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My wife and I have been christians for about 38 years. We have worked with children in youth groups and teaching sunday school. It has been our experience that when the entire family is going to church and is involved in it's activities, that the family is more unified. The parents have fewer problems with their kids. This does not mean the children are perfectly behaved all of the time.

While on the surface it appears that religion is on the rise, the statistics of divorce, unhappy marriages, and parents having more and more problems with their children are telling a different story. Even among those who attend church, there seems to be more questions of how to cope with the load of troubles in their life.

The bible has a wealth of solutions to many of our questions about what to do every day. We go to church on sunday and hear a very inspiring sermon. By monday morning the sermon is forgotten and we go about our business as though we had never heard it. We need to put into practice the lesson from the sermon before we leave the church building. Everyday we should read the scriptures used in the sermon on sunday. Then, everyday, we should look for opportunities to live what we have learned.

The best way for a family to become more united is to read the bible together as a family. Then everyday when you ask another member of the family, what did you do today, they may be able to tell you of some special act they were able to do because of what they learned from the bible.

Your kids are looking to you as their parent to set the example. If you want your children to respect you, then you need to set the direction for your family. God set the father as the head of the family. So, I charge you fathers to be christian fathers leading your wife and children as an example of a Godly man. Do you want a more loving and devoted wife? Do you want children who are respectful, honest, loving, giving, confident and prepared for every day life? If you answered yes, then, fathers, lead your family as God has directed in the bible.

A family united in Christ, is a family united forever.

I urge all parents and their children to read the information below and think about it. Much of the information and resources are from different religious sources. But, all of it is useful for everyone.

I Know My Guide

I do not ask to see the way my feet
will have to tread;
But only that my soul may feed upon
that living bread.
'Tis better far that I shall walk by
faith close to His side-
I may not know the way I go, but oh,
I know my Guide.

By: E.S. Hall
Just A Minute

I have only just a minute,
Only sixty seconds in it,
Forced upon me, can't refuse it,
Didn't seek it, didn't choose it,
But it's up to me to use it;
I must suffer if I lose it.
Just a tiny little minute,
But eternity is in it.

Writer unknown

Take Time

Take time to live: It is the secret of success.
Take time to think: It is the source of power.
Take time to play: It is the secret of youth.
Take time to read: It is the foundation of knowledge.
Take time for friendship: It is the source of happiness.
Take time to laugh: It helps to lift life's load.
Take time to dream: It hitches the soul to the stars.
Take time for God: It is life's only lasting investment.

Writer unknown

Christian Family Values
The heartbeat of the Christian family!

Families need Christian family values if the traditional family unit is to remain strong. Marriages are ending in divorce at record numbers. Many children learn their values from television, movies, and music instead of from their parents.

Our culture is attempting to redefine the definition of "a family" to placate the voices of a small minority. We are told that it's okay for a child to be raised by two men or two women.

Some common misconceptions:
* Fathers are not needed in the home
* Children are not negatively affected when Mom works outside the home
* Children can make lifetime decisions before they even enter puberty
* Spanking is harmful to children and should not be practiced

These are only a few areas that society is attempting to blur for the Christian family. If you have experience with any, or all of the above misconceptions as I do, then you probably are in agreement.

A father that is absent from the home is felt very deeply by the children. A Christian family should do everything possible to keep a family together. Marriages are more brittle today than ever before. So are the children. All of the broken marriages leave countless children behind in the aftermath; fearful, and often angry.

These tragedies need to stop. This is not what God intended for us. This must all surely break His heart.

Sacrifice "things" for your children

There are times when a mother must work outside the home and there are times when it is a choice. A Christian family needs to place their children above their possessions. Have less "stuff" so you can give them more "time". If you must work, then work. What are your priorities?

Pet peeve time

We all know there are times when a Christian family chooses divorce over reconciliation. It's the easy way out. The real losers are always the children. Especially if they are in Jr. High School or younger.

Don’t place your children in a position where they have to make a choice between parents at such an early age! You will scar them emotionally for life!

Spare the rod?

Scripture is very clear about spanking. It’s not going to kill your children. In fact, it’s going to help them. The key is to spank in love and not in anger.

If you want your Christian family to thrive then you really need to consider spanking your children for direct disobedience. It will bring peace into your home and will show your children that you love them enough to discipline them. They will probably even thank you for the spankings some day.

"He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him." (Proverb 13:24)

Our goal is to share some Christian family values that we have discovered over the years that have kept our marriage strong and our family close.

Everyone has their ups and downs in a relationship, but relationships are not meant to be disposable. During the 'downs' we need to look for ways to fill the relationship up with love once again. During the 'ups' we can let the relationship overflow with the love we have, spilling onto those around us.

Below you will find links to pages that speak specifically about the Christian family values of marriage and raising children. We'll share some ways to keep all of your relationships fresh in the pages that follow so that you can avoid the pitfalls we mentioned earlier.

The above information was borrowed from:

Raising Christian Children

As Christian a parent, your heart's desire is to raise Christian children. It's hard to imagine a son or daughter growing up without Jesus and yet it happens all too often. There are no magic pills to cure this parental concern.

What we offer is our experience and thoughts based on what has happened in our own home. Our prayer is that you may find something of value that will help you in your goal to raise Christian children in your home.

The points that follow are generic unless otherwise stated. Thankfully there are basic principles that apply to both boys and girls. We all know there are also some unique differences that need to be addressed for both boys and girls as well.

* Give them quality time - More than anything else, your children need time from you. Viewing television together is a poor substitute for quality time with your children. Going to movies together is not quality time together. You need to be interacting. Quality time involves face time. There needs to be conversation and maybe even some laughter. If you miss all of the other points, please don't miss this one!

* Lead by example - You cannot expect your children to read the Bible if you don't read the Bible. You can't expect your children to pray if you don't pray. You can't expect your children to tithe if you don't tithe. You can't expect your children to love their neighbor if you don't love your neighbor. Are you following this? If you expect them to live as Christian children then you need to live as Christian parents. Pretty simple stuff.

* Reassure them they are loved - We have found that the simple yet powerful act of saying "I love you" often can make a huge difference. When a hug or kiss is included with the verbal reassurance of love a powerful statement is made. Tell them and show them that they are loved as often as you can because the days slip by quickly!

* Consistently hold them accountable - Children want to know that they have boundaries. They often test those boundaries. When your children cross the line that you have set you must consistently hold them accountable for their choices or they will become confused. They need and want consistency.

* Teach them respect - Teach your children to show respect to adults as early as possible. As they grow older you will need to have consequences for when they do not show respect to either their parents or another adult. If they do not learn respect at an early age it is difficult to teach as they grow older.

* Share in meaningful conversation - Your children need to know that when they are speaking, you are actually listening. They may not choose the best times to tell you about their day. Often you may be busy or watching a TV program. They need to know that they are more important. Give them the time even when it's inconvenient. It will strengthen your relationship and they will come back for more!

* Love your spouse - Your children need to see that their parents are in love. There’s nothing so comforting and reassuring as knowing your parents are authentically in love. Boys will learn how to treat women properly, and girls will learn how to bless their future husbands. When Christian parents show their Christian children how to love their mate it goes a long way to authenticate their parental teaching.

You are probably wondering how all of this is supposed to help you raise Christian children. After all, isn't that what brought you to this page?

Nothing we share on this page will guarantee that your children will mature from Christian children to Christian adults. You already know that Jesus desires a lifelong personal relationship with your children. It comes down to the work of the Holy Spirit in their lives and the choices that they make.

BUT, you do have a HUGE INFLUENCE on your children as they grow and mature!

The suggestions we made above, basically all come down to having a great relationship with your children. Teach them how to love. Teach them how to show respect. Teach them how to communicate. Teach them how to take responsibility. Teach them...

When your Christian children are experiencing an excellent relationship with their parents, the likelihood of them experiencing an excellent relationship with Jesus will increase.

We hope these suggestions will at least get you moving in the direction you were seeking. Raising Christian children is a lifetime job and is done mostly on your knees.

The above information was borrowed from:

Raising Christian Children

There's nothing more challenging in life than raising children. This is a day by day, child by child experience, and we are all continually learning. After consulting a number of resources, we have compiled a list of recommendations on raising Christian children. In our home we strive to follow these guidelines, however, we are not perfect parents or perfect people. As with all areas of our life, we ask God for guidance. He is the ultimate resource on our precious little ones!

Pray for your family everyday. Give thanks to God always for the family he has blessed you with!

Begin at birth by saying bedtime prayers with your children. You will be amazed how quickly they pick them up and begin to say prayers with you! Help them to know Jesus as early as possible.

Read to your children bible stories from a children's bible for their age group. Family time together, sharing the bible, can be a wonderful experience.

Have patience with your children. Our world sadly goes much faster than theirs.

Always build confidence in your child whatever you do!

Listen to them, don't just hear what they are saying. Give them your attention and direct eye contact when they speak to you. Your children will let you know what concerns or problems they have and what you may need to bring to the Lord in intecessory prayer for them. This is such an important way in which to show them how much you value them, and will also teach them to pray for others.

Do everything possible to have Mom stay at home with the children. This is a great sacrifice for many women who have already established themselves in a career or families who have great financial difficulty on one income. Pray to God to find the way if this is a difficult situation for you. God will provide, if you believe He will! There is no greater duty on this earth than raising your children.

Watch over your children diligently! Know where they are, who they associate with, what they are watching on T.V., listen to the music they are playing....get involved and stay involved. This is not dress rehersal! You only get a small amount of time to raise your children. Train them with good Christian moral values.

Give you children responsibility early in life. Children love to "help" at a very eary age. They may not do things quite the way YOU would, but this is not the lesson they are learning. Children trained in responsibility grow up to be self reliant dependable s. Todays work ethic is a prime example of lack of responsibility in the home. Teach them to respect proper authority.

Keep control over the home! Your children must know who is in control.

Love your children unceasingly! Hug them as much as possible. Praise them always! Nothing delights a child more than praise from his parents. Let them know just how much you love them!

Spend time enjoying your children. Get down on their level and see the world they see! Its marvelous to bring out the child in Mom and Dad! Seek to have as much family time as you can.

Have a "happy home". Laugh alot!, proper humor is good for the soul. Always look for the positive. This is a great attribute to give your children.

Study your children! Know who they are, what they love, even the bad "bents"(as they call it!)that they may have. (we ALL have them!) Bring out the good whenever possible....and try to re-shape any tendancy towards bad behavior. Each an every child is a masterpiece from God, individual in nature. Allow them to be be individual, never compare.

Keep your marriage together! Children need parents who love each other! If you grew up in a home where your parents did not get along whether divorced or not, you have probably realized later in life the devasting results in your own personal life. However, you can overcome this!! Many are living proof it can be achieved. Parents,.....your relationship is a role to your children. What kind of marriage do you wish for YOUR children! Show them how to be good partners and parents. Be the example of a good Christian marriage! Your conduct as well reflects to your children your walk with the Lord! What are you teaching your children by your example? Remember, you are raising someone else's future husband or wife, mother or father! Parents with solid Christian marriages have a spiritual, loving home that filters down to their children, which provides them security, love, the foundation for self-esteem, and the example with which to make a good decision in for themselves.

Take your children to a good church you feel comfortable with as early as possible. Make sure you do not neglect your own relationship with God. How can you lead your family, and children without it?
Tell your children you are sorry when the need arises. Afterall, we parents make many mistakes. Teach your children how to forgive and be forgiven by being the example!

Discipline Your Children When Needed! We believe the bible to say that children must be lovingly guided with patience, humility, compassion, kindness and taught right from wrong as early as possible. Parents who do not consistently and fairly deal with the "wrongs" in a child's life will most likely face many years of misery! If necessary, seek qualified professional help.

Proverbs 22:6
Train up a child in the way he should go,
And when he is old he will not depart from it.

Proverbs 13:24
He who spares the rod hates his son,
But he who loves him is careful to disciplines him.

The above information was borrowed from: Christian Marriage & Family

Parents For Christ
Parenting resources, children's activities, prayer room, and forums.

Parenting 101
Seven articles written from a Christian perspective using Biblical principles for building strong, love-bonded families.

Children 111: Parental Bible Goals For Raising Godly Children
RESULTS OF FAILURE TO FOLLOW BIBLICAL PRACTICES IN RAISING CHILDREN. When parents fail to stay in God's plan for the Christian Way of Life, they will not be ...

PARENTHOOD a divine stewardship
Practical Christian parenting in ...Provides applied truths from the ministry of Watchman Nee and Witness Lee on practical Christian parenting in raising children through character training ...

Raising Children with Faith Religion Five Steps Christian Parents
...Raising Children with Faith Religion Five Steps Christian Parents.

Parents Raising Children|Bible Principles of Family Training
How can Christian parents succeed in training children in the home? ... Bible principles about child raising are so critical that we will refer to them as ...

Christian Parenting, Honor Your Father, from Families OnLine Magazine
Christian parenting raising spiritual American Christian parenting raising spiritual American ... If you help your children to mix equal parts of the flour, ...

Raising God-Fearing Children
Raising God-Fearing Children. By Peter Hammond ... I firmly believe that one of the most important parts of any Christian family with children should be ...

Children 124: For Parents, 19 Helpful Thoughts on Raising Children
The goal is to equip our children, these young saints "for the work of the ministry" (Ephesians 4:12, Mark 10:45). Our goal as Christian parents is to train ...

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